(This post was supposed to publish yesterday and didn't. No idea why.)
I can't believe J will be 6 weeks old tomorrow. Where has the time gone? It's certainly going way too fast.
Today, while being held by his great aunt, he turned his head towards my voice and smiled. Talk about melting my heart....
Sometimes I wonder if I'm still guarding my heart from being hurt again. Its not that I don't love my son, because I do. I love him more than my own life...but there's still that fear. I guess its to be expected. Some days it still doesn't feel real...is he really mine to keep? But, for how long? I hate being like this...I hate having these fears...while I accept this new life, I definitely don't like it. Being a BLM sucks.