16 Months

What would life be like...it's so hard not to wonder what life would be like if you were here.  Christmas was a little easier this year, but your presence was definitely missed.  At least this year I was able to hang your stocking.  :)  It looked just right!

I still miss you...I guess know I always will.  Some days are easier than others.  I'm just afraid that I will forget you; forget what you look like; forget what it felt to hold you.  I don't ever want t forget you.  I just read a post from another BLM and her husband and it seriously upset me.  How could anyone say a child didn't exist just because that child is no longer here?  Let alone a family member.  You know, baby girl, I've dealt with so many people leaving my life because they couldn't handle my grief.  I'm a better person for it.  But if anyone EVER had the audacity to say you didn't exist, that person would be gone from my life forever, family or not.  You DID exist, and you will ALWAYS live in my heart. My soul hurts...16 months is far too long.  I love you Addie B.  Life will never be the same...but I'm okay with that...I think.  Happy 16 months sweet girl!