It hasn't been easy finding hope these last (almost) 6 months. However, I'm going to take a stab at it and join several other mommas like me and join Franchesca's blog hop (see the link/button above). I am going to write about the big and little things that have brought me hope since I gave birth to my silent, beautiful daughter.
1. First and most of all, my husband has been the biggest contributor of hope. Just seeing him smile lets me know we can get through anything. The amount of complete SHIT we have been through together is astounding...but what amazes me even more is that he is still here. His smile, his presence, tells me that there is hope for a brighter future. And I love him more for it.
2. Secondly is my mom. She has been more than I could ask for. She understands, she knows what its like to go through the loss of a child. Just seeing how she survived her own loss and now my loss tells me that I too will survive.
3. A wonderful, longtime friend. Although she doesn't know it, she has been such a wonderful resource, a wonderful support...another survivor. She has gone on to have 2 beautiful children since the loss of her first baby. She's a wonderful mom and a better friend than I ever could have asked for. Cindy, you have no idea just how much hope you've given me.
4. Meeting other moms like me, those of us who share a unique yet terrible bond, has given me a different type of hope. I read everyday about moms who are feeling the same things I am, going through the same emotions at the same time...and I know I'm not alone. Although I've never met, and probably never will, these women, I feel closer to these women than most of my other friends. They really understand. Its women like Franchesca, Carly, Melissa, Sarah, and so many others that have given me hope...if they can survive, so can I.
5. And, my newest source of hope is my memory box project. I want so badly to create a legacy for my daughter...to show the world just how much I loved her. I HOPE to bring some sort of joy to a family like mine, a family that has to say goodbye too soon.
So, there it is. My celebration of hope. I know its not much, but hope is there. I know as time goes on, there will be more sources of hope. But for now, this is what works for me.
7 comments:
Beautiful! I love your idea for the memory boxes!
Beautifully written! I agree with you meeting other moms who know exactly what you are feeling and going through has made a huge difference for me. Sending hugs your way!
Love it! I also agree about meeting other moms. in a situation that shouldn't be normal.. you somehow seem to fit.. it's not so awkward and uncomfortable. Thank you for sharing.. and I feel that same kind of hope with our project as well :)
Hi Mary,
I'm so glad that you have people in your life that bring hope to a situation that can often feel so very hopeless. Keep looking to those that lift you up and offer you rays of sunshine. Thank you for posting on the blog hop. I find it so interesting reading the everyday miracles that are a part of our lives. Hugs to you...and your sweet Addison.
What a sweet post...hope is what we are all searching for I think. I am so happy to know that my journey has touched you in some small way and given you hope, I know I feel the same way about all the other BLMs.
I am so glad you are doing your memory box project too! I have to say that it has given me the most hope I have had in a long time. My heart is just bubbling over with joy from all of the things we are able to do because not because our children died, but because they lived (even if it was only within our wombs or for a short time).
These are wonderful sources of HOPE. It helps to have people there to support us through the tough times.
I really enjoyed reading this. We all need hope. It's neat reading about the strength of others. It encourages me to be strong. ;)
I'm following from the hop.
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